Actual Bed

Right now I’m actively avoiding eating fudge rounds.

I really want a fudge round.

I ended up having a food disaster night last night. It might be because we didn’t eat dinner until 7:00? But I’m not sure about that, because I did eat a good-sized bowl of Special K to tide me over and I still ate like a hog afterward. Maybe I waited too long to eat the Special K. Maybe I didn’t give the Special K enough time to settle into my system, activate my hypothalamus to tell my brain I no longer needed food. Maybe both of those things.

I’m glad to be home, but at the same time, I’m struggling. Struggling not to repeat old habits. I wasn’t kidding about the fudge round. I want it so, so badly. And, given recent history, it probably wouldn’t really be just one.

I’d fall asleep in this chair, but I’m the only grownup home. Hmmm, so? The kids are watching TV, they’ll be fine. It’s not like I’m going to actual bed upstairs with the door shut.

Sleep is a good antidote to overeating—for me, at least. Sleep is incompatible with eating, and it eats up time. It also helps you function better.

I am tired…