Nice Big Long One for You

I managed to end my day at around 30 points, which is good for me, lately. Even if I have a good day today, I’m not expecting a loss at weigh-in tomorrow. I’ll be lucky if it’s not a pretty big gain after some of the nights I had.

I don’t know why I’m having such a hard time staying on track. Last year I was a rockstar with it. There’s a lot of temptations in my house, but I think there probably were last year, too. It’s not my environment, then. It’s something internal.

I don’t feel like the Depo has released its hold on me any, so it could be that. But you’d think it would be starting to lessen by now. Well, you’d think.

This time last year I was still home all day, writing for Content Cucumber. That didn’t seem to matter, I was able to stay out of the kitchen. Then I’d finish around 2:00 and hop on the bike. Almost everyday. I’m sure that contributed to my success.

Working full time and away from home, it’s much harder to maintain a consistent daily exercise routine. It’s about the last thing you want to do when you get home.

I think it had to have been my mindset. I tracked the good, the bad, and the ugly. But it was mostly good.

Anyway, summer’s coming, and I’ll be forced to wear shorts. Normally I have pretty nice legs, but I’m self-conscious because of weight gain. Also, I’m a redhead, of course. So my skin is extremely pale. I’m embarrassed of my white legs. Seriously, they’re blinding.

My stepmother told me a few years ago that no one wears nylons anymore. She was right, but damn, I wish that wasn’t the case. Those at least disguised my whiteness.

I don’t tan, so it’s no use trying. Sunless tanner turns me orange. Spray tan is about the only thing I haven’t tried, and I don’t dare.

At least I don’t seem to have varicose veins.

I have a terrible time shaving my legs because I do it in the shower, and I don’t have my glasses on, so I can’t really see what I’m doing. So I come out and my legs are still half hairy in places.

I feel like I’m sharing too much. No one wants to hear about my half hairy, pale, overweight legs. Let’s talk about my sleek, slender, smooth legs that are only a few months away if I can just manage to change my night time habits for the long term.

That’s probably what it is. Habit change. It takes anywhere from 21-something like 200+ days to change a habit, depending on various factors about the habit.

There’s an awesome article dispelling the myth that it only ever takes 21 days to change a habit. I wish I could remember who wrote it. I ghostwrote an article about the article, but I don’t know if I’m allowed to share it with you, since it’s not my name on there. Not sure how that works.

Four fingernails. I’ve broken four fingernails over the last 24 hours. Just saying.

Anyway, maybe I ought to read up on habit change, see if that helps me.

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