How to Measure Success

It was a very helpful workshop this week. I talked about how well I tracked my food from May to December, and how I long to get back on that wagon but don’t know how. One lady, a nurse, suggested I think about May to December and what made me track so well then. I said I had had a long streak of successes. Kimmy asked what’s making me think I’m not successful now.

I’ve been thinking I’m unsuccessful because I’ve gained almost 20 pounds and haven’t lost weight. But I wasn’t even thinking about the fact that for the last, probably, month, I also haven’t really gained much weight, either. I have hovered around 166 for at least three weeks. I haven’t gained quite 20 pounds through this ordeal so far.

Granted, it’s not over. The withdrawal effects may be even worse than all I’ve endured up to this point. But let’s hope not.

I am having headaches and spotting, lately. Men, if you don’t know what spotting is, you’re probably better off.

Anyway, Kimmy and my compatriots helped me to see that success doesn’t have to be measured only in pounds lost. Maryanne even said: “You haven’t given up. You’re here.” And she was right.

I almost didn’t go today, and it would’ve been easy to skip. Mom wasn’t going, and I have a lot of things to do today. Mostly though, I was worried about all the weight I thought I’d gained this week.

I should reward myself this week for tracking fully everyday; not necessarily weight loss, because I have control over tracking. Or even five of seven days would be better than no days.

I have to go and try to find my debit card. It’s in the house, somewhere, so thank God for that. It’s the second time in two days I’ve lost it. If I don’t find it soon I’m going to have to order a new one, and you know what happens, then. I’ll find the original.