Hello Me (It’s the Real Me)

Title courtesy of Megadeath.

I had to settle for a pair of black loafers that are half a size too big and fall off my heel when I walk, but believe me, it was worth it. Those shoes I had on cost me twice as much, and I could barely walk in them.

I did get an iced coffee at DD, because I was out at my car, anyway, and let’s call today what it is: a wash.

I used up most of my break doing a return (other horrible but good looking shoes), purchase, and getting coffee. Now it’s basically over, and again, I don’t feel like I’ve had ample time off my feet. But that’s my fault. I had also forgotten to take off my name tag when I was about to get in line, and this older man flagged me down to do a price check, and I didn’t feel like I could tell him I was off the clock. It just seemed mean.

So maybe I take a few extra minutes getting back. Well, that would be like usual.

I was late to work, too. Quite a bit today. I had to call Desmond out of school and had forgotten until I was on my way out the door. Then I also got an eyeful of myself in the mirror on the bedroom door and had to throw a jacket on over my sweater to hide the yuckiness of my sides.

I do have shape wear, but I’m reticent to use it because I feel a bit like I’m lying. I feel compelled to say “This is not really my body, everyone, I still have no waist. I’m totally cheating with Spanx.”

That’s why I resisted padded bras in high school, too, even though I was very modestly-endowed. A little padding is good for support and conceals you if, you know, it’s cold 😳. But those “look 2 sizes larger” contraptions are pure cos-play.

And, yes, I realize that I am probably the one person on Earth who notices or cares what I wear or don’t wear. It’s just the principle of the thing. Even if no one else ever knew, I would still know.

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